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Donna Gets it Right ----

5-10-03

The First Three Letters of the Word DIET...

THE FIRST THREE LETTERS of the word diet spells DIE. With that said, I am about to embark on another attempt to lose weight.

Notice how I said "lose weight", not lose SOME weight. I have way more than some weight to lose. I am not one of those people who say that diets don't work. Diets DO work -- probably every single one works. It's human willpower that gives out.

I love those infomercials that tout the same stuff. "Diets don't work, but take this pill and the fat will just melt off AND you can eat anything you want", or "Lose weight while you sleep". I love that one.

I don't know about you, but I can't sleep while my heart is pounding. These pills are basically full of caffeine or worse, Effedra. I don't think they are the same thing, but they have the same effect. Increase your heart rate. I've read the back of the boxes of the pills sold at the local drug store. "This drug contains about the same amount of caffeine as a cup of coffee." Ok, so why not just drink a cup of coffee?

They show pictures to prove it too. Here's a picture of a chubby woman in a bikini -- yikes -- looking very sad. Then a picture of her, sans 50 lbs. and totally ripped. In case you don't know, ripped means her body is muscle-bound and sculpted perfectly. Wow, can I look like that by just taking this little pill? NO.

They never show any "during" photos. That's because they want you to think there is no "during". She just woke up after a night of fat melting and looked like that. That's what these companies are ultimately trying to make us believe. It takes no times at all to lose weight, it's effortless and you can still eat like a pig. We all know this is bunk, yet these companies continue to make fortunes. Besides caffeine and Effedra, here's a major rule: If the diet product is being backed by a third rate TV actor/actress, stay away from it. Besides, I think I've seen the same guy selling the diet stuff also hawking a stain remover.

So, I'm going to try something completely different, something hardly anyone is telling me to do. Quit eating junk and get some exercise. Yeah, I know, there is a group that does that. But I don't want to pay $10 a week to wait 45 minutes to weigh in and another 30 minutes trying to stay enthusiastic while clapping for someone that lost 3/8 of a pound. Yeah every little bit counts, but I've become grouchy in my old age. I think I'm going to do this quietly. Which is why I'm writing it in my column. No one reads it anyway, least of all any member of my family or my non - SC friends. I'm kidding of course, I know some people read it. I don't have any sage advice or all-knowing wisdom. I'm just observant , I like to think out loud and hopefully I have a sense of humor.

So, wish me luck if you will. I could maybe use some advice, but not too much. I'm not going to cut anything out completely, except fast food. I think diets that tell me not to eat certain things or to only eat certain things will help me fail. I'm just going to make a few rules for myself:
1.) No eating in the car, because that usually means I've gotten something that's bad for me anyway. Besides, you may not think you look bad eating while driving, but after observing people do it when I'm driving to and from work, I'm telling you it ain't pretty. I'm going to take the time to eat at home.
2.) No seconds, unless it's salad, and
3.) If someone at work says, "I'm running to 7-11 or McDonnalds, does anyone want anything?" I'm going to keep my mouth shut.

Until next time……

Donna

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Get it ALL Right!


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