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Donna Gets it Right ----

9 - 28 -02

Scary Stuff and a good night's sleep

I'm getting old. Yeah, I know, we all are. But I'm really just now starting to feel it. My 10 year old is starting to ask questions that I now have to have answers to. No more putting it off until she's older, because she's older NOW.

Frankly, I don't mind having "The Talk". I'm already starting to have it in bits and pieces. I want my kids to hear things from me. If they have questions, I want them to come to me. I want to be one of those Moms that isn't afraid to talk about anything. Well, just about anything. Or, at least, feel comfortable talking. I've had to answer some hard questions here lately, probably like everyone else who has kids in these times.

I think I was all prepared to answer the standard ones about training bras, makeup and other "girl" things. But now I have to explain why people fly planes into buildings, why some mommies beat their children or why Wal-Mart has all those pictures of kids at the front door. Sometimes my mind is a blank and I truly don't know what to say. I have to look in those big baby blues of hers and give the best explanation I can. It never seems good enough to me. I ask her "do you understand what I'm saying?" She says, "Well, sorta."

I don't like "Well, sorta". That usually means she's going to draw her own conclusions about things. Which is OK sometimes, but mostly I think it means she didn't understand a thing I said. That figures. We have little talks and conversations just before she goes to bed. But my rule is that these are only to be about happy things. Before bed is not the time to talk about scary stuff. Or I'll get a tap on my shoulder at 3am, "Mommy, I'm scared."

Sometimes I want to say, "Well, you know what, honey? I'm scared too. Mommy forgot to buy milk today, we've got about $4.95 in the checking account and it's still another week until payday, the car is making a funny noise and I seriously regret cutting my hair short." I keep all that junk to myself, though. She'll have her own grown up scary stuff soon enough. I walk her back to bed, eyes half closed, lay down beside her, and that makes it all better for her. She understands, that for right now, everything is going to be okay, because I'm there beside her.

Until next time.....


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