 Donna
Gets it Right ----
9 - 02 -02
Get Off the Phone! ---
Cell phones have gotten completely out of hand. The
other day I was surfing the net and found a link that
said: "See What Cell Phone Matches You and Your
Personality"
Huh? You mean I can get a chubby cell phone with brown
hair and brown eyes?
Oh, you mean one that's like me. Can I program it to
say sarcastic things instead of ring? Things like, "Hey,
I'm ringing. Someone wants to talk to you while you're
driving. Do you want to endanger yourself and other
drivers, or what?" Or, "Hey, you big beautiful
hunk o' woman. Pick me up and fondle me." Can I
go over the top and have it make burping sounds instead
of ringing? That would be especially fun while standing
in line somewhere.
This is where I side with my husband, who has no patience
with bad drivers. If you're swerving because you're
on the phone, my advice to you is -- GET OFF THE PHONE!
Emergencies are the only acceptable excuse.
I see it everyday -- swerving, going 50 mph in the left
lane when the speed limit is 65 mph, sitting at a green
light and fumbling for papers. I give a little honk
for them to move, and I get the finger in return.
Do most people really need cell phones? Sure, they're
good for emergencies, if you car breaks down and the
like. I had a cell phone once. I was only going to use
it for those occasions, but I got addicted to it and
couldn't control myself. I racked up the minutes and
went well over my allotted free ones. I used it to call
home and ask stupid
questions, order out food, call a friend and yak about
nothing, just like most people I see on cell phones.
They talk about nothing.
Here's a typical conversation:
"Hey, whatcha doin'."
"Nothing. Whatchew doin'."
I hear them ringing in movie theaters, in line at the
grocery store -- a girl actually shushed my kids once
because she was on her cell phone in a McDonald's and
couldn't hear. I just smiled and politely told her there
will be no shushing my kids in McDonald's.
Sure, it's a free country. Talk on your cell phone all
you want. Just be careful out there in your car -- and
don't even think of shushing me.
- D
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